I’m Excited

There has been so much going on lately. All exciting. I think I may have finally come up with a title for my third book to the Reaper Trilogy.

The Soul’s She Reaped

What do you think? Be honest. I hated the first title I had, which was The Reapers Victims. I wanted something with reaper, but I couldn’t never come up something that made sense. I like this one better.

Next! I have some exciting news for my hardcover version of The Emerald Reaper. I can’t wait to show everyone. I don’t want to come out and say what it is just yet. You have no idea how hard it is to hold it in. I want to tell the world. But I’m waiting until I have the book in my hand. I am positive you will all love it.

I am also almost done with the first draft for the third book. I can’t wait to have it finished. Then I’ll do a bunch of editing, but that’s to be expected. I’m hoping to have it done by the end of the year.

Thank you so much!!!

Love, Shelby

Day 6 of Quarantine

Hey guys,

Sorry I didn’t get a video up yesterday. I tried to make it this morning, but it wouldn’t upload. I’m not sure why. I have had no problems until now. Either way, my day yesterday wasn’t that fulfilling. All I did was wash my floors and make tiktoks. I made like 5 or 6 of them. Nothing really special about that. I did show off some of my tiktoks in the videos. If you want to check them out, my username is Partsgirl77. Mainly showing off my car. I got my new headlights put in. I was super excited about that. Another video I made was for my car club. Wisconsin Mopar Enthusiast. My club thought it was really cool too. I had also realized that I don’t talk about my car much on this page. Everywhere else that is all I seem to talk about. That will possibly change in the future.

Well that is about it. I’m going to start the video for today here in a bit. I pray it works this time.

Have a goodnight.

Here is the one tiktok I made for my club

Guess who got COVID?

Me… yes that would be me.

So for my first day in quarantine, I am going to make a video diary for each day I am stuck in my house. Since I’m going to be home all day for 10 days. I am going to give you some insight into some of the writing I have been working on. It will mostly be about the third book to the Reapers Trilogy. I also have been doing a lot of writing on vocal lately. Be sure to go check that out.

Vocal.media

I will get the first diary out later tonight. Should be a good time.

Writing Update

Hey Everyone,

How is everyone doing? I know I don’t post a lot and I’m trying to change that. Like I’ve said in my first post, I’ve never been a blogger before. I’m not sure what to talk about. So, for this I’m going to talk about how my books are coming along.

The third book to the Reapers Trilogy is going, but not as fast as I would like. I’ve been in college for the past few months and working on the book has been put to the side. I still try and write it every now and then, just to keep the juices flowing. I still haven’t even come up with a title for it. Right now I just call it ‘The Reapers Victims’. I do not like it and hope to come up with something better. The book is going to be about all the points of views from the victims in the first book. She kills over 40 people. I won’t be writing everyone’s points of views, only the main people. I was going to write the last book about her escaping from the mental institution she gets sent to, but my buddy gave me the idea to write about the victims. I really liked it so I stuck with it. I can say some chapters are longer than others, but some chapters in the first book were short as well. I’m really excited about it and have about 5 chapter finished already. I know it doesn’t sound like a lot, but as I said, some chapters are longer than others.

Another book I’m trying to write is a fantasy. I have never written a fantasy or SiFi book before. I never had interest in it, but after writing a fanfiction, I had to make it into a real book. So, there are actually two books right now. The first book is ‘The Tainted War: Nithanean series ‘. This one basically introduces all my characters that are going to be in the second book, which is already written. Well mostly written, I’m still fixing it up. I don’t want to publish it though until I have the first book to it written. The second book will be called ‘Finding Sunny: Nithanean series’. I’m also not very confident about the books. Like I said I’ve never written anything like it. It’s not my usual genre to write, so I’m not sure if it will be a good seller. I might put out a post about the books and I would love any feedback. I may put out a few excerpts from each book that is already written. I have gotten feedback on the second book. People seem to like it, but I want a broader group of people that would be interested. I don’t want to put it out there if no one will buy it.

I have a few more books I would like to get into once I finish ‘The Reapers Trilogy’. One is an idea my dad actually came up with after talking to my daughter. I don’t have a name for it. It is basically about a child who can hear her dead grandmother. Her grandmother died and was cremated. After the funeral the child started hearing voices coming from the cremation box. Her family assumes it’s just make believe. It isn’t until bad things start to happen, they realize there is more to the child’s story. The child eventually begins to hurt the family and others around her, all because her grandmother tells her too.

The second one is actually my daughters idea. She wants me to write about a queen and her evil daughter. Her daughter becomes evil from a rare ring that she finds in one of the storage rooms of the castle. The queen has to do whatever she can to bring her daughter back to the good side. My daughter is really excited about this one. She made me write down all the main points and asks me all the time if I’ve written more of it. It’s all because she decided to play a princess one day who became evil from a ring.

Well that’s all I got for today. Let me know if you got any ideas for the title to the third book of the Reapers Trilogy or if you want to hear more about my fantasy book idea. I would love to hear any feedback.

Thank you all and have a great day,

-Shelby

It Should Of Been Me

            Three years ago, I watch them all get on a bus and leave me behind. Six months later, only three quarters of them returned. I should have been on that deployment. I should have died with my platoon. Instead I was stateside, hanging out in the motor pool, driving supply trucks every day. I hung out with my friends and partied every weekend, while my platoon was getting lit up by insurgents. I wasn’t good enough to get deployed with them. I wasn’t good enough to die with them.

            Today is the anniversary of the deaths of thirty good men and women. I’m hosting a BBQ in honor of those men and women. A family I have lost and can’t seem to get over. I used to be pleasant to be around. I used to laugh and play around. I used to be the life of the party. People are lucky to get a smile out of me these days. I feel guilty about their murder. Some say it’s survivors’ guilt. I say it’s all my fault for their dead.

            Everyone comes over, all excited to hang out, eat some good food. I have a surprise for them. One they will never see coming. That is, until he walks through the door. The one that came back and tried his hardest to make me believe it wasn’t my fault. The one that did everything he could to help me and all I did was push him to the side. I pushed him away, like I did everyone else. He knows something is up the minute I flash an old smile at him. One that no one has seen in years. He immediately grips my arm, ready to pull me away and talk to me. Lucky for me, he’s stopped, and I have to mingle with all these people I don’t speak to anymore. The people that think everything is fine now.

            They all act like I never changed. They all talk to me like I’m the old me. I laugh with them, letting them think I am. I have a few drinks, a few shots. I let them believe that the alcohol still gets to me like it used too. Alcohol does nothing for me these days. I drink it like water. Old memories pop up, reminding us of good times. Ones making this decision even easier. All this pain, I can’t deal with it anymore. He pulls me to the side after about an hour, dragging me into the house and up the stairs. He closes the door behind me and grips my arms, looking me straight into my soulless eyes with his distraught ones.

“I want to save you.” His body trembled as he spoke.

            “Ha! Save me? Save me from what? Myself?” I laughed. Watching him cower even more at my sinister tone, letting go of my arms.

            “I can save you.” He said with a bit more confidence, but his voice cracked towards the end.

            “You can’t save me. No one can. You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved.” My voice only gets louder as the words flow through my chest.

            “Yes, you do. I know you do. I can see it in you.” He takes a step towards me. How bold.

            “I lost that will years ago.” I sneer and turn away from him.

            “When they left?” His voice went soft, but his words make me snap my vicious eyes back to his chocolate brown ones.

            “You know nothing of why I am who I am!” I roar.

            “I know you blame yourself for not going, for their deaths, for not saying the things you wish you could have said. I know you hid your pain behind that mask of yours. You’re afraid to show your vulnerability. You think you’ll look weak. Well, your mistaken. None of that makes you look weak. It just shows how strong you really are.” Now he stood staring at me, towering over me. Panting from his rant.

            “You think you have me all figured out. Well, think again.” I whisper, then I turn to storm out of the room.

            I don’t hear footsteps behind me. So, I know he isn’t following me. I’m furious. I don’t notice the people in my way as I continue to move. They’ll move for me. They always do. If it’s not for the scowl covering my face, it’s the darkness in my eyes. The way they encase my once baby blues. Soon they will be nothing but a shadow of who I once was. He has no right to come here and act like a hero. He will get nowhere. Save no one. Who does he think he is?

            Everyone is here. Family, friends, colleagues. All mingling, enjoying the BBQ. Smiles and laughter is what I encounter when I walk outside onto the porch. No one even notices me step out. No one sees my anger. No one looks up. I made this party; I invited all these ungrateful people here. No one even knows the real reason why. I stay there a few more moments, breathing in the fresh air. Taking in the sunlight. A smile creeps onto my face. Yes, now is the time. 

            “Ladies and gentlemen. May I have your attention?” My voice booms over the crowd.

            Everyone stops what they are doing and turns to look at me. Confusion is written on their clueless faces.

            “I want to say thank you for coming today. It has been great to see those I haven’t seen in ages and those I see every day. You all look wonderful and happy. I want to remember us just like this. if we could all crowd together, I’d like to get a picture.” Tears are beginning to come to my eyes, but I do what I can to hold them back.

            They all congregate together on the porch. I stay off to the side at first. Watching them get settled. More come from inside. slowly integrating with the rest of the group. No one has yet to notice the absence of a camera. No one seems to care as I walk to the front of the group. That’s when I spot him. He’s up in the left-hand corner, watching me. His eyes never leaving me. He knows. He knows what’s about to happen, but is he going to stop me? No, he isn’t. He is too much of a coward, too. He mouths the word no to me as I put my hand behind my back. I lift the back of my shirt and grab the pistol that’s leaving an imprint on my back. The pistol grip sits perfect in my hand as I pull it around.

            I fiddle and play with the small killer while I wait for them to get situated up there on their pedestals. I look to the ground; not sure I can keep watching them. Knowing what I know now. The pain still lingers inside me. It has been growing each day. To the point where I’m finished with it. No one understands or wants to understand. So, it’s time for the game to be over. I’m ending the play. I let a tear glide down my cheek as I bring the gun up to my skull.

            That’s when they look. They point and stare. Some gasping in surprise, others covering their mouths. Some even look away in shame. But no one moves their feet. Either they are frozen to the steps or this is how they really feel. None move to stop me. They all mummer their words of fright, but keep it between each other. No one calls out to me, telling me not to. They all stare as I put my finger on the trigger. I’m not afraid to die. I’ve been waiting for this. I knew they wouldn’t care, but I guess deep down I had hoped someone would have tried.

            He watches from his spot in the corner, not moving, eyes wide. Probably wondering if I’m really going to do it. We lock eyes and I see the fear and pain they hold. Though, he makes no move. He just stands there. Waiting for my next move. The coldness from the barrel chills me a bit, but it soon replaced with warmth from the rage I’m holding in. It doesn’t take me long to realize. No one is going to stop me. They are all going to let me die. Watch me die. Or waiting for me to chicken out. I will not disappoint. I take a deep breath. With a slow, steady movement of my finger, I pull the trigger back. And my world goes black.